I’ve lived long enough–and talked to enough people–to know that everyone has something. Behind the exterior, behind the face, behind the brilliance or seeming-perfection, there are stories. People have lived through loss, hardship, trauma, and fear; they have scars that are visible and invisible; and despite all evidence to the contrary, most–if not all–people are dealing with things far beyond what they’re telling you.
If you don’t know the trials and difficulties, you just might know them well enough yet.
I certainly know the days when I’m having a hard, difficult week, and yet the shiny internet surface–or even my in-person face–doesn’t show the rougher edges. People don’t know all that’s going on.
It helps to remember a key phrase–I believe I heard it first from Jenny Blake, but I’ve heard it elsewhere too:
“Don’t compare your insides to everybody else’s outsides.”
Everyone’s got a whole lot of work on the inside, and more stories than you can tell. Don’t assume that what looks perfect is always so easy.
And if you’re having a bad day, or a hard time: keep going. I believe in you. I’ve spoken to enough of you these past several months to know how incredible you all are. All of it. The good and the bad and all the bits in between.
With love,
Incredible writing, Sarah. You’ve been a tremendous inspiration to me over the past few months. Thank you for your searching, questioning, doing, writing and sharing. I am deeply grateful.
Another beautiful post Sarah. Thank you for your writing!
Sarah:
What it may take to be completely fulfilled is to understand this: the natural human condition is to tirelessly strive– and never really arrive at a “place” called fulfillment. Striving is inherited from thousands of years of biological selection and is literally imprinted in our DNA. It’s what we are built to do. If we can understand that striving will result in learning and growing and never ending positive change, then with that wisdom we are in a completely fulfilled place.
Pete
Hi Sarah!
Thanks for reminding us of this fact that we seem to take for granted especially the blood, sweet and tears.
Thank YOU, Kat. The more that I write, the more I find and run into the most beautiful people and souls around the web. Thanks for being here.
Of course! I’m glad to be here, and glad you are here!
Pete, yes. I agree. It’s hard to be motivated by accomplishment and achievement and know that stasis–stillness–is not necessarily something that will make us happy. Growth (although not hypergrowth) is often a condition of being, and to that end, we’re always changing, striving, and growing.
I think understanding the paradoxes of humanity–that we are growing and achieving, yet also resting and finding balance–gives us more freedom and fulfillment, similar to what you said.
I wondered where I have seen that quote before….. see if you can spot it here ;) – http://gapingvoid.com/ie/
Amazing! Thank you–I knew I’d heard it many a place before.
You always touch my heart, Sarah. Thank you. :)
Sarah, thank you for sending this out again. It was a reminder that I needed as I have been feeling like I don’t fit in any where. I just have to remember that it is not me, that it is them and to stop comparing myself to everyone else. Happy New Year and may it be great for everyone.
John, you–whoever you are–is exactly where you need to be. I’ve spent a lot of my life figuring out what I like and what I don’t like–and feeling like I don’t fit in anywhere. Keep figuring it out. It’s a process of trial and error. You’ll find some good things, and you might surprise yourself.