Category: Life

“What I Do”

Posted on by Sarah K Peck

Option 1: Landscape Architect, Explorer 

What do I do?

I never know how to answer this question. Do I start with swimming? Architecture? Writing? All of the people and things and quirks I love about San Francisco? My incessant love of traveling? I’m never sure how to answer or what people are really asking. I find the question a confusing one, and I think a lot of people find also it difficult. But that’s not necessarily a bad thing. So for a while, I’ve been thinking about precisely this question: What are we really asking? What are we trying to find out about each other? Are the current answers we give and quip satisfactory? And how might we better answer it? (And lastly, what is it that I do, as an example–if you’re curious, I answer in long form, a style I do enjoy).

First: the question. In a previous post I asked whether or not the question, “What do you do?” is a bad question, and it generated several good, thoughtful questions. As I wrote:

“Is ‘what do you do?’ such a bad thing to ask? …I love the topic of this question, and I don’t think that it’s necessarily a bad question. Let’s look at the heart of why we ask it, and also, where it comes from. First, we ask the question because we want some way to find out–to hear–the stories of other people. We want to connect with other people and find common shared experiences that tell us whether or not we can understand them, become friends with them, get along with them, etc. We should pay attention first, to the intent of the question–is the asker curious? Do they want to connect with you?–before we judge them on the semantics or sophistication of their ability to connect. In short, be gracious with people who are inquiring earnestly. 

Second, the reason that we predominantly ask the question “What do you do?” — comes from a century of focusing solely on work and security as our livelihood. For the last several decades (or more specifically, 1930 – 1960) it was very important that you find a stable job, and you keep it. Couple that with a burgeoning corporate structure and a society that was embracing larger and larger businesses (and benefits, and corporate institutions), and the easiest and quickest way to figure out who someone was — was by asking what they did for a living.

We realize — and most people know — that asking “what do you do?” as the only question to probe into someone’s fascinating, interesting, complex set of stories is very superficial. There’s a lot more. And I think each of us can ASK more interesting questions and learn, once again, how to tell our stories to each other in a way that lets us connect. Because we’re human, and we’re curious, and we want to know what the other humans around us are, well, doing.  Continue reading ““What I Do””

You Have to Ask.

Posted on by Sarah K Peck

What happens when you don’t ask? Well, one thing’s for certain: You won’t find out.

So, ask. Say what you want. Often you can’t get what you want until you put yourself out there.

Will you like my Facebook page? How about my new Swimming page? And will you come find me on Twitter, if that’s where you are? 

Sure, that’s easy, you say. Of course I will. (*Whew!* My brain thinks. Man, I didn’t want to ask–what if they said no? Ahh, the lovely fear of rejection.)  

We don’t get what we don’t ask for.

So, what are you asking for? What do you want? What are the questions you have for other people? Here are a few things you can ask: Continue reading “You Have to Ask.”

“Desiderata,” by Max Ehrmann (1927)

Posted on by Sarah K Peck

Wandering through the Presidio National Park in San Francisco, and overlooking the San Francisco National Cemetery. Each and every human, past, present and future: You are all loved. 

Desiderata (Latin: “desired things”), is a 1927 poem by American writer Max Ehrmann (1872–1945). It’s one of my favorites. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do. Sometimes I can sit and chew on each of these sentences a couple of times, soak them in.

Desiderata.

“Go placidly amidst the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its shams, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful.

Strive to be happy.”

Much love,

World Domination Summit: Day 2 and Beyond

Posted on by Sarah K Peck

Sometimes I get caught up in the whirlwind of the weeks that it’s hard for me to find time to sit down and write my posts – it’s been about a week and a half since the epic second rendition of WDS concluded, and I went straight back to work,  followed by a  weekend spent with the Bold Academy teaching another storytelling workshop; This week I’m traveling to two of our seven SWA offices to interview the partners in a new project recording the oral histories of a 55 year old firm. But more on all of this later–for now, I’m backtracking and catching up on the part two of an epic weekend itself: a weekend called World Domination.

As Chris says, there’s more than 160 posts out there that have recapped the weekend, so I’ll focus on my take-aways from the sessions that impacted me: World Domination, Day 2 – Sunday

This year, I was picked to lead one of the workshops – an event both terrifying and immensely satisfying; as part of my long-term goals, I want to get more involved in teaching and public speaking again. While I’ve worked for years as a swim coach and teacher, as well as a private instructor, formalizing my experience in the architecture and psychology worlds still feels new to me, and I’m joining toastmasters, taking acting classes and generally nerding up on all things public-speaking in order to continue to get better at it (As with everything I’m doing – I’m sure I’ll have resources coming soon!) For anyone with questions about public speaking or presentations, leave them in the comments – it will help me get better at doing it! But back to last weekend…

WORLD DOMINATION: DAY 2

Chris Guillebeau kicked off the event by reminding everyone that inspiration is nothing without action – everyone who comes to the conference to get inspired must also leave knowing that they are going to do something to make change in the world they see.

Now that a week has passed, I wonder: what are you taking action on this week? Have you taken steps to make shit happen? Have you mapped out a plan to keep yourself accountable? I have one goal for the next three months – and it involves 12 steps (or, once-weekly check-ins every Friday). What about you? Continue reading “World Domination Summit: Day 2 and Beyond”

100 Gratitudes, One Hundred Dollars, and the $29,000 Birthday Swim

Posted on by Sarah K Peck

“With great power comes great responsibility.”

We live in a world of abundance, and this is the year that I finally became worth nothing. Out of all the things that I worked through and built this year, the entire time I still had a bed to sleep in, a family close by, a job that I went to everyday and plenty of food to eat. A pool to swim in, places to run, a city to call home.

When I returned from WDS this year, I was humbled, quiet, confused, and a bit sad: despite all of the engagement, inspiration, and learning, I still wonder: Am I doing things worthwhile? I’m not sure yet. Is there more to do? Absolutely. Have I reached all of my capabilities? I don’t think so. Can I do more? Yes. There’s so much more I want to do.

But while I sit trying to figure it out, other people walk hundreds of miles trying to find the most precious resource of all – water. A drop of clear liquid, the power of life. Some people, however, don’t have the luxury of $100. Of food, water, or a roof over their head. Of a bed to sleep in at night. Of sanitation.

So today I’d like your help with a few things. Three things, in particular. Continue reading “100 Gratitudes, One Hundred Dollars, and the $29,000 Birthday Swim”

100 Gratitudes

Posted on by Sarah K Peck

“Dwell on that which makes you happy, and you’ll be happier. You are what you think.”

What are you grateful for? Here’s a list of one hundred things that I’m grateful for today; there are thousands of things.

Hugs
Unexpected generosity
Cities and the intricacies of urban fabric and invisible systems.
My hands
Thank you notes
The internet
Smiles from strangers
Refrigeration
Antibiotics
Conversations
Vulnerability
Kissing
Open spaces
Gardens
Old people
Wonderful storytellers
Good Great sex
Coffee
Spices
Handstands Continue reading “100 Gratitudes”

World Domination in Tweets

Posted on by Sarah K Peck

It’s not a secret that I love twitter. It’s an incredibly useful place to find information (and people) around the ideas or projects that you’re interested in. Here are a few of the best tweets from this past weekend–what people had to say and share about the weekend conference #WDS in Portland. Recap(s) coming next!

How To Live.

Posted on by Sarah K Peck

My grandmother,  7/20/1926 – 6/15/2012.

I write to you from a space of confusion coupled with adrenaline; sadness mixed with exhilaration; excitement tinged with the loneliness of loss. Over the past few weeks I lost my grandmother, spent time in the hot Arizona desert city Tucson with my Grandpa and family while laying a little lower under the radar, and when I returned found out that one of my mentors and close teammates from college was involved in a serious and terrible accident while competing in her first Iron Man in France. While on the bike portion of the race, she was hit by one of the emergency ambulances and has been in a coma with a broken pelvis and head trauma since.

If emotions are like the 88 keys on a piano, I feel as though my left hand is playing a slow, rumbling sad song as a background melody, while the opposite side of the same keyboard is dancing out a light staccato tickling, my right hand moving quickly and lightly over the upper sets of keys on the piano surface. Emotions aren’t simple, nor are they serial; part of the complexity of humanity is the ability to feel multiple things all at once.

The reality of death and dying makes me ever more curious about the act of living and the aging process. What does it mean to live? How will we design our lives, as Richard Wurman has asked, and what will our legacy be? I’m reading and re-reading some of my favorites, from Frankl’s Man’s Search For Meaning to a book by Sarah Bakewell on Montaigne and the art (and act) of living. Throughout it all I can’t help but think:

How do we deal with life, the precious, wonderful resource and thing that we have?

Or rather, how do we live? Continue reading “How To Live.”

The Never-Ending Curiosity of a 5-Year Old: Why, How? What? and Why?

Posted on by Sarah K Peck

Why?

Why-why-why-why-why?

My brain is like a 5-year old, and up until recently, it was like an over-caffeinated 5-year old without a chance to get outside and run around on the playground. I find myself fixated on the WHY question, as well as the WHAT and the HOW, and I can’t help but wonder, about, well, everything.

In no particular order, questions that dart in and out of my mind:

Writing, Documentation, Blogging

You Have Permission.

Posted on by Sarah K Peck

I’m planning my week, my day, and a couple of thoughts run through my head: I’ll try this. I’ll do this. Ooh, wouldn’t this be exciting! I can’t wait!

And then the other thoughts, the safety traps, the counter mechanisms, the judgments, the space between what I want to do and what I’ve done so far. The voice that says it’s not enough, that I’m not anywhere close, that I shouldn’t try, that I’ll never get there.

In a rough-and-tumble few weeks, I Failed. Fell. Knocked down. Stood up. Tried to do simple things and couldn’t do them. Tried to do hard things and found myself, normally able, somehow incapable. I stopped doing things because my expectation was so high that the nominal version of achievement felt so inadequate that not doing something about it felt better than going through the muck of re-building my momentum.

Frustrated, aware that I was frustrated, and incapable of figuring out what to do next, a good friend took a hike with me and said, “Give yourself permission to be here.” Continue reading “You Have Permission.”