Gratitude, Holiday Cheer + Post-Thanksgiving Epic Giveaways.

Congratulations to Melissa for winning a copy of Shane Mac’s book, “Stop With The BS” and to Claire and Anne for winning spots to Molly Mahar’s Holiday Council (which starts Monday, November 26th– join me there! I’ll be on the interviews and on as many calls as possible). I’ve been hearing wonderful reviews of the book and so many of you have reached out to say how much you like the layout and design: thank you! I’m SO GLAD!

Also, stay tuned because I STILL have LOTS more to give away, even *after* this post, and this post is a big one. Nuts, right? Happy Holidays to all of you. 

Gratitude, for all of you.

As I write on this blog and interact with so many people via email and in the comments, I find myself overwhelmed. Overwhelmed, mostly with gratitude. Your letters, emails, comments, and positive energy make me feel so lucky. From the bottom of my big, deep, water-loving heart:

Thank you.

You are all wonderful. Thank you.

Thank you for supporting me in the Charity Swim we did earlier this year, thank you for participating so actively in this blog, thank you for surprising me, thank you for teaching me. Thank you for all of your wonderful comments about the recently-launched book, and for everything you do. I appreciate it, more than you probably know.

And in the name of gratitude, I’ve put together my first “Epic Big Fat Delicious Wonderful Holiday Sale.”** 

(The name needs a little work, right? A free present for someone who comes up with a better name for what I’m doing today, deal? Deal. Leave a note in the comments and I’ll send you something special if I like it). 

The writing on this website is all free–all of the essays, thoughts, wandering, questions, ideas and inspiration. I write because I have to, because it’s in my soul to write, and my writing ritual is to open up a notebook or a computer every time I have an idea, sometimes multiple times a day. I’ve been known to obsessively type into my phone new ideas whenever I’m out and about, drafting new thoughts. Beyond the prolific nature of this site, however, there are also lots of ways to work with me for people who want more advanced content and specialized one-on-one time. For those of you that have been wanting to work with me, check it out. There’s LOTS of good stuff coming at you today: Continue reading “Gratitude, Holiday Cheer + Post-Thanksgiving Epic Giveaways.”

Do You Have A Life Philosophy?

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! May your hearts, minds, families and homes be filled with gratitude and blessings. As part of this season’s focus on gratitude and thanks, I’m doing a huge number of THANKSGIVING GIVEAWAYS!  I’m giving away lots of good things throughout the entire month of November (and now I’m up until Christmas–I have more things than I can ever use, and there will be LOTS of giveaways). In the last post, I gave away a copy of Shane Mac’s book, “Stop With The BS,” and today I’ll be giving away TWO free seats to Molly Mahar’s “Holiday Council,” a 21-day course that helps you reflect on the year past and plan for the upcoming year, beginning November 26th, with the fabulous Molly (and I may even make a cameo in her interview series!). To win, see the question at the end–the winners will be chosen at the end of the day Friday, November 23rd.

In the coming weeks, I’ll be giving away three copies of a documentary, creating up a “Pay What You Can” day, and opening up new spots for the Start Something Project in December and January. Lots of good things! But now–to the bigger question, and the focus of this essay: 

Do You Have A Philosophy Of Life?

Do you have a life philosophy? A great goal so important that you’re willing to sacrifice other goals? Many writers today categorize this as your “passion,” your “purpose,”  or your “legend,” often with the intention that you should know what it is soon and figure it out.

Personally, I find this stressful to consider: we don’t always know what we like, and sometimes we have to get really good at something before we find it satisfying; the paradox of passion is that often, in my experience, you have to grow it. Continue reading “Do You Have A Life Philosophy?”

Reinvention Isn’t Easy, But It Is Necessary: 22 Thoughts from Julien Smith

It’s November, the season of gratitude–one of my favorite seasons. In the spirit of gratefulness, thanks, and learning, I’ll be giving away prizes with almost every single post all throughout November. Some of the things I have to give away include a copy of Chris Brogan and Julien Smith’s new book, “The Impact Equation,” copies of I’m Fine, Thanks, (the documentary by Crank Tank Studios), a digital copy of Do Something, and a copy of the upcoming book by Shane Mac, Stop With The BS. If you haven’t yet, make sure you sign-up to be notified of new posts by email so you can win all of these goodies: there are a lot of giveaways this month!

Today’s thoughts come from a powerful presentation by Julien Smith at last months’ Powder Keg conference in Indianapolis, Indiana–and a chance to win a copy of his latest book, The Impact Equation. 

Reminders.

“If we don’t cannibalize ourselves, someone else will.”
(Steve Jobs)

Why did Apple make the iPhone? Continue reading “Reinvention Isn’t Easy, But It Is Necessary: 22 Thoughts from Julien Smith”

Indianapolis: PowderKeg 2012

I spent the last weekend in Indianapolis, Indiana, as part of the inaugural 2012 Powder Keg Conference put on by The Verge celebrating StartUps, Developers, and Innovation in the central hub of Indiana. While I’d been to Indiana before, I’d never made it to Indianapolis, and it was beautiful to see another Midwestern city in the Fall. I was fortunate to join a host of talented and diverse speakers including Julien Smith, Kate Endress, Scott Case, David Blaine, Scott Dorsey, Dave Knox, Jonathon Perrelli, and many more. I’ll recap some of the best tidbits and ideas on this blog in the weeks to follow, but I wanted to share some of the photos of this beautiful city.

 A view of downtown Indianapolis. Continue reading “Indianapolis: PowderKeg 2012”

Show up.

Show up.

Every day, or as often as needs to be done.

Figure out the schedule. Perhaps it’s once a week.

It’s not about extremes. It’s not about doing a magnanimous or extraordinary thing on one singular day, or in one moment.

It’s the accumulation of micro-actions.

It’s about consistency.

It’s about showing up, even when things aren’t perfect, even when you’re not sure, even when you’re scared.

Show up.

It’s doing something, even a little bit at a time. Maybe a 10-minute walk during lunch, or a 30-minute light walk, rather than a run. But you’re doing it. You’re doing something, not nothing.

Today.

Show up.

“What I Do”

Option 1: Landscape Architect, Explorer 

What do I do?

I never know how to answer this question. Do I start with swimming? Architecture? Writing? All of the people and things and quirks I love about San Francisco? My incessant love of traveling? I’m never sure how to answer or what people are really asking. I find the question a confusing one, and I think a lot of people find also it difficult. But that’s not necessarily a bad thing. So for a while, I’ve been thinking about precisely this question: What are we really asking? What are we trying to find out about each other? Are the current answers we give and quip satisfactory? And how might we better answer it? (And lastly, what is it that I do, as an example–if you’re curious, I answer in long form, a style I do enjoy).

First: the question. In a previous post I asked whether or not the question, “What do you do?” is a bad question, and it generated several good, thoughtful questions. As I wrote:

“Is ‘what do you do?’ such a bad thing to ask? …I love the topic of this question, and I don’t think that it’s necessarily a bad question. Let’s look at the heart of why we ask it, and also, where it comes from. First, we ask the question because we want some way to find out–to hear–the stories of other people. We want to connect with other people and find common shared experiences that tell us whether or not we can understand them, become friends with them, get along with them, etc. We should pay attention first, to the intent of the question–is the asker curious? Do they want to connect with you?–before we judge them on the semantics or sophistication of their ability to connect. In short, be gracious with people who are inquiring earnestly. 

Second, the reason that we predominantly ask the question “What do you do?” — comes from a century of focusing solely on work and security as our livelihood. For the last several decades (or more specifically, 1930 – 1960) it was very important that you find a stable job, and you keep it. Couple that with a burgeoning corporate structure and a society that was embracing larger and larger businesses (and benefits, and corporate institutions), and the easiest and quickest way to figure out who someone was — was by asking what they did for a living.

We realize — and most people know — that asking “what do you do?” as the only question to probe into someone’s fascinating, interesting, complex set of stories is very superficial. There’s a lot more. And I think each of us can ASK more interesting questions and learn, once again, how to tell our stories to each other in a way that lets us connect. Because we’re human, and we’re curious, and we want to know what the other humans around us are, well, doing.  Continue reading ““What I Do””

Chasing Freedom: Independence, Adventure, and The Year-Long Secret Race to #WDS

INDEPENDENCE. WHAT IS IT?

A year ago, I went to one of my first conferences I’ve ever attended—aptly titled, “The World Domination Summit. (Try telling your parents and your colleagues about this one. Bemused looks and strange faces ensued.) I went anyways. As a slightly more introverted than extroverted person who struggles a bit with social anxiety and large groups of people, I wasn’t sure about meeting all of these new faces, or being part of a crowd. (There’s a reason I spent the majority of my childhood swimming, gardening, or reading–all solo activities. While I’ve shifted in my twenties and become much more of an outgoing person over time, I still find the solace of writing and blogging to be much more rejuvenating than large crowds of people.) In short, I don’t always like going out in public. I was especially terrified because aside from one or two people, I didn’t know anyone, and I didn’t have a wingman.

At the conference, I met some of the most remarkable people I’ve encountered, from Nate, who was walking across America, to Nick, a fellow swimmer and comrade in adventures in New York, to JD, who has taught me so much: In one weekend, I made more friends and found kindred souls than the years spent in various jobs. The recap of the event took four separate posts (Day 1, Day 2, Day 3, and Photos) – and Chris joked that I should become the “scribe” of future conferences because of my note-taking obsession.

This weekend, I’ll be returning to round 2 of the World Domination Summit (#WDS), as both a participant and a workshop leader. But even more than that, I’m excited because a secret year-long race is now coming to a closing point …

Because a year ago, I met three people who joined me in a secret race, and we made a pact that by this time, this year, we would all take strides towards creating freedom and big changes in our lives. Continue reading “Chasing Freedom: Independence, Adventure, and The Year-Long Secret Race to #WDS”

The Job Problem: Stop Worrying and Start Doing (You Only Need to do 2 Things)!

Quick update: Thanks to everyone who voted in the last survey! The results are in, and it looks like the books I’ll be reviewing are Chris Guillebeau’s $100 StartUp and Jonah Lehrer’s Imagine; I’m also primed to focus on my next new project–the Do Something book (part of the Start Something Project, coming soon). If you’re curious about either of those, I’ll have more updates very soon–and you can sign up here to be the first to know about each of these projects as they get off the ground). But more on that later… right now, let’s talk about the two things you’ve gotta do in life. Only two, I promise.

Second update: Apparently those of you on the email list weren’t getting any of the posts from the month of May. Hope you enjoyed the vacation! The bug should be fixed by now, and you may get a bonus email or two all in a hurry–let me know if there are other problems and I’ll fix ’em up.

The job problem.

A lot of people are out of work today, particularly at both ends of the age spectrum. Young people, disenchanted with the broken promise of education, are finding that a college or master’s degree doesn’t promise a paycheck or a life path. Instead, folks with advanced degrees are bagging groceries and queuing up coffee drinks.

At the other end of the spectrum, especially for people in their late 40’s and 50’s —  finding a new job is challenging, particularly after dedicating one or more decades building skill sets that may or may not be transferable to the type of work available today.

We’ve heard of the split economy — 90% of people are in a recession while 10% are experiencing a huge boom (predominantly in the tech industry). I live in San Francisco, where we’re pretending the recession never happened and where start-ups and businesses are booming. Travel to anywhere else in the world, and you’ll see panoramas of unemployment, students buried by debt, living at home, and of 30-somethings moving in with mom and dad. Both the American Dream and the American Education system are broken.

This blog post won’t fix either of those, not today at least. (I’m working on it…) 

But I do want to debunk one myth.

The myth that one job, one career, one thing is solely responsible for your happiness, welfare, productivity, and life’s earnings.

For fresh college grads and more senior employees alike, lets deconstruct the framework of “work.” We want to have work that is meaningful and valuable, right? But no one will hire us, right? Let’s re-frame this:

I think you really only have to do 2 things.

First, you have to make some money. Life ain’t free and it costs money to live each day, even if you minimize this as much as possible. Food and shelter require some financing.

Second, you need to do something you enjoy.

Stop.

Hammertime. Wait … I mean–Nevermind.

Here’s the thing. One thing, job, or entity doesn’t have to satisfy both objectives.

In fact: it’s probably highly unlikely (and not very smart) to put all of your eggs in one basket. Don’t search for the one job that will make you shit tons of money and also make you unbelievably happy. That’s also a lot of pressure. And I’m not sure that’s very wise. You wouldn’t invest all of your savings in one stock, would you?

I’m not saying that amazing jobs don’t exist. I’m just offering an alternative: why invest your life in one job? Instead of fretting over the right opportunity, the perfect job, the ideal scenario (and since when have we ever been right about our life path looking forward?)–go out, make money somewhere, and do something you love somewhere–possibly somewhere else.

Find something to do.

If you’re a young college grad, go ahead and wait some tables. Bag some groceries. Make some coffee. Walk a bunch of dogs. Clean cars. Paint houses. Mow lawns. Yes, your shiny diploma and superb linguistic skills from the Ivy League Institution you attended make you overqualified at the task.

Got that? Find something that makes you money.

Next, you need to find something you love.

So what?

Starbucks offers great health insurance, 32-hour work weeks, and you can get all of your shifts done in the morning from 5am until noon and have the rest of the day to do something you love.

Then, go find, build, and do something you love. Start a crochet website. Publish your essays for free, because the first two years of a writers’ life is generally slow, painful, and unpaid. Remember: Mark Twain was an insurance salesman–yes, he worked as an insurance salesman. He also wrote a bunch of books people today still remember. Which do you think he loved more?

Let’s say you’re a bit older. If you’re 55+ and want to postpone a sudden or unexpected early retirement, I am sympathetic to how difficult it is. The older generations are the most challenged age group to get rehired. At the end of your career, searching for a new job is frustrating.

The advent of “not knowing” what the future holds can be paralyzing, suffocating, miserable. Those without jobs often spiral into depression and helplessness because of the loss of control about their future and outcome. Because you don’t know when a job lead or prospect will turn into paid work, you can’t estimate with any certainty the outcome of your present work efforts. The longer you’re unemployed, the harder it is to motivate yourself out of unemployment.Being unemployed is one of the worst things you can do to your career, and the longer you’re unemployed, the more unmotivated you become, as you habituate and adapt to the lifestyle that soon becomes insidiously “normal.” 

I think there needs to be a pattern-disrupt. Face the facts. It might be the case that you aren’t ever going to get another “real” job. Yet I think that there are always options, if you re-conceptualize what it means to work.

Find some way to get paid. Your job is to get some money in your pocket. Hook yourself up with some benefits. Tutor high school students. File papers as a desk clerk. Go the old Starbucks route.

Get strategic about how to generate other income, too. For example, what ways can your current assets or spaces be used to earn money? Rent a room (or two) in your house to a grad student or professional who needs a co-working space. Sign up for AirBNB. Or make part of your space a vacation rental. Got a car? Put your car on one of the local owner car sharing services like Get Around or Relay Rides. Do daily task services like Task Rabbit or Zaarly, fill needs on Craigstlist, become a personal assistant on Exec or Zirtual, or give away a bunch of your stuff in an old-fashioned garage sale.

And at the same time you’re finding ways to make some money, make sure that you’re also feeding your soul. Find something you love. Carve out an hour or two a day to dance, read, laugh, play, or explore. Start a garden. Write the book that you want to write. Start a blog. Take a class in computer programming. Become an entrepreneur. Teach courses at the local university.

A good rule of thumb? Maybe spend about half your time doing the work, and half the time playing. Can’t afford it? Make the weekends for play and the week for fun. Hustling like crazy (and I’ve been there, so I get it) — set aside one night a week, minimum, for you time. I take dance lessons on Wednesday, and it helps me skip through Thursdays and Fridays.

Open your mind. Try new options .There’s a lot of way to get what you want (money and happiness) — and it doesn’t have to come from one place.

Sometimes I bemoan the tedium of parts of my job. I’ll be honest–image editing for thousands of pictures and minor tweaks to web frame corrections or endless hours of copy editing–these aren’t exactly the most titillating tasks. As my friend Alex reminds me about those tasks that sometimes get tedious:

“Sometimes you have to feed your soul, and sometimes you have to feed your cat.”

Perhaps you have to find a couple of places to figure out how to make that happen, and in the future, it might not look like what you think a traditional job looks like.

That’s okay.

If you’re waiting for perfect, remember–all you’re doing is waiting.

Go feed your cat.

And never forget: you must also feed your soul.

 

How Can I Be Better?

How can I be better?

Nearly every day, this is a question I struggle with.

Today is impermanent, imperfect, temporary.

We can always be better. 

What will you focus on? How can you get better?

I write every week, almost every day, in an effort to become a better and better writer. Jack London, in his letter to an aspiring writer, cuts to the chase with some (brutal) feedback that many of us (as un-edited, free-publishing internet writers) need to hear.

Feedback is when information about the past influences your present and future actions. As Jenny Blake writes, Feedback is Career Currency: learn to love it.

In a recent review, I asked my bosses to give me the brutal truth: Feedback will sting for a few days, but worse yet is staying the same for the next forty years without improving your craft.

Take the feedback for the long term.

It’s hard to ask for it, but it’s unbelievably worth it.

How can you be better?

How can I be better?

April Miscellaneous: Updates, Link Love and Thoughts on Burning the Midnight Oil

Updates: I’m bursting at the seems with about a hundred posts I want to write, and they are all currently buried in my notebooks, brain, and on half-finished word documents on my laptop. I just took a peek at the unpublished drafts in my queue (110) and the number of essays I’ve hit “publish” on (173) and I realized that I have a lot I need to hurry up and ship— to not be afraid of doing, as Seth Godin says. For the moment, though, I’m caught in the spin-cycle of travel (see below!) and I don’t have the time to sit down and write as much as I want to, since it’s been back-to-back weekends of traveling and engagements. Before my next scheduled post goes up, here are a few updates and miscellaneous notes from the last of March and early April. And before I get even further, Happy Spring! 

Welcome to all the new faces!

It’s been a busy few weeks with this website, and I want to say thank you (and hello!) to all the new faces who have stopped by or who have crossed paths with me lately. If you haven’t yet, send me a message or a tweet to say hello. So many of you have emailed and I’m overwhelmed with gratitude at the thoughts and conversations happening offline. You are all brave, marvelous, and stunning people: I hope you all know that. I am so inspired by the stories I get to read, by what you share and by how much each of you are doing to make things happen. When I get tired, stressed out or worn out like the best of them, I get to read your stories happening around the web and world, and I get re-energized.

Seen and Heard: Recent Posts

In the writing world, there’s been quite a few posts going around that I’m delighted to be a part of (and I’ve got some more in the works, coming out soon, so stay tuned!) If you missed it, here are some of the latest:

  • Chris Guillebeau and I chat about how to figure out whether you’re happy in your job — and what to do about it if you’re not. In the interview, Chris and I discuss how change can happen if you’re unhappy. My answer? We need to take responsibility for our own happiness. It’s no one else’s job or responsibility to help you feel satisfied, happy, or inspired:  it’s yours. Read the full interview here. (Don’t believe me? See the recent post on The Atlantic about how changing your personality can make you happier).
  • Lifehacker liked the post and the cheat-sheet so much that Melanie Pinola picked it up and shared it, making my twitter and internet stream go quite crazy for a few days. (Whoo! Exciting! I’m famous in the internet world!) The fame has worn off, but I definitely saved the re-tweet from The 99 Percent in my keeper file. Yes, I do stuff like that.
  • A huge thank-you to Get Rich Slowly and my friend J.D. for sparking the conversation about pursuing your passion. With thoughtful commentary by Marie Forleo, Knot Theory, and others about finding the right balance of work you love, or a life you love (or both), there’s good arguments to be had for why several options might work–there isn’t a “right” way to getting to your dreams.

March & April Presentations

In the speaking arena, I’ve been involved in several presentations lately and I’m thrilled with the outcome (and amazed, again, by the amount of energy it takes to prepare and conduct these events. A huge round of applause for the teams that put each of these events together). After I unpack a bunch of this work, I hope to put together some guidelines for what I’ve learned so far. More to come.

  • At UC Berkeley, I moderated a panel on Landscapes of Uncertainty in conjunction with the new Ground Up Journal being launched this May. Check out the image from the presentation (above!). I was fortunate to be on stage with Ila Berman, the Director of Architecture at CCA, Douglas Burnham, Principal of envelope A+D, Scott Cataffa, Principal at CMG, and Sha Hwang, Design Technologist at Movity-Trulia. Our conversations meandered through the uncertain terrains of technology, landscape, economics, and professional practice. (My notebooks are filling up faster than I can empty them out into the blog-o-sphere!)
  • Two days later, I went to the University of Pennsylvania to talk about the work that I do with SWA Group and saw a lot of familiar faces at my Alma Mater. It reminded me how much changes, so quickly, in the space after being a student to becoming an alumni and an employer. It seems that not so long ago I was just on the other side of the table, handing my resume and portfolio over to be perused by prospective employers.

And there’s more coming up:

Sheesh, I’ll stop talking about me:

There are other things in the web besides what I’m doing! Here are some of my favorite posts and events I’ve seen lately:

  • GetAround’s curation of the top ten TED Talks to give you the power to change the world. I just re-watched Simon Sinek’s and Seth Godin’s and was re-energized by the power of ideas and the power of figuring out your WHY. One day’s homework? Watch these two TED Talks.
  • Gutsy? Paul Graham’s blog post “Frightengly Ambitious StartUp Ideas, is a free list of ideas that (“just”) need to be implemented. If you have the guts, the time, the ambition, and the belief in a way to figure out these problems, go get ’em. The world needs you.
  • Brene Brown on the Power of Vulnerability. You don’t have to be rock solid all the time. (Cue forthcoming post: “Things That Make Me Cry.”)
  • Your Clothes? Maybe they actually are important: they affect your self-perception. Turns out image does matter — at least in that it influences our confidence and how we feel. Maybe it’s time to go shopping after all?
  • Your Brain On Fiction: Turns out, story time is important after all because it re-wires and changes our brain. Maybe next the science will tell us that recess is important, too, and naptime is essential for creativity. (I don’t know about you, but I’m going to read stories, play on swings and take sunny naps and long runs whenever I can during the day and not wait for someone else to tell me it’s good for me. I believe in trusting the soul and the body. Our bodies are pretty smart, if we’ll let them be.)
  • And lastly, the story of someone who emails back. (And this is why I try, even as I’m sitting behind my computer eating late-night dinner and I should probably be sleeping–to always send at least a reply back. I can’t always do a full conversation, but sometimes it means something to realize that on the other side of the internet, there’s a person, and we get it. We’ve been there. It’ll be okay).

Health, Sanity and Balance

I’m not sure I believe in the old axiom of “work-life balance,” but I’ll definitely be the first to admit that my schedule lately has been a little… askew. I’m excited and grateful for these opportunities, and also wary of burning the midnight oil too often. Cue a good question: why don’t I take a break from this blog? The answer, to me, is simple: Because I can’t not. My notebooks are full to the brim, and the more things I do, the more I learn, the more ideas I have, the more I want to write.

In a recent rant I enjoyed, John Carlton summed it up well:

“I am reminded of the constant possibility for adventure and plot changes in our lives.

I’m appalled when I meet folks who are bored with life. Are you fucking kidding me? Bored? We’re a race of brainy, built-to-endure loonies on a spinning orb in the middle of a vast universe…

… with absolutely nothing or no one holding the power to control what you do next. Sure, there are laws, steel bars, fences and scowling mates (plus your own sense of decency and fear) abounding everywhere…”

I laughed out loud at this. YES. If you’re bored, go do something: there’s too much going on to sit behind your screen and spend any more time thinking when you could be DOING.

Above all, I’m filled with an overwhelming sense of gratitude and wonder. As Jill says, happiness is an attitude, a framework we can develop — but even people with a positive outlook sometimes have bad days. :) On those grumpy days, you can bet I’ll be curled up in my bed, pillow over head, hiding and recovering. I’m fairly certain that will be happening very soon for this blogger.

With love, wonder and gratitude.